this tumblr me hadiahkan untuk you. i will not update this tumblr again after this last post. mostly semua yang me reblog arah tumblr ane untuk you. since me inda berapa tahu cemana luahkan perasaan me banarnya, i used tumblr as alternative ways. if you baca dari awal then you’ll know how huge my love to you is, this tumblr explained some reasons.

and about my fb, i wont deactivate it or changed it since that facebook tah yang buat tani sama-sama walaupun tani banyak kelayi pasal facebook but facebook basar jua jasa nya arah tani :’)

if you plan untuk end this relationship, the things yang me pernah bagi you,semualah termasuk buzz light year, i want you to keep it but if keeping it,menyakitkan hati you just throw it away okay? and about my atm card, just give me whenever you want :’) and about your things yang you bagi me, can i still keep all of it? :’) please? :’)

and can i still keep you? :’)

assalamualaikum hey :)

sorry i know you didnt want me to text you anymore but you just got to know this, if it’s too long and if you think you’re reading this is wasting time then im sorry but u just got to read this all.

dear love,

i know this would be memalukan since it’s public but apakan dimalukan, there’s nothing to be ashamed off when it’s real/fact. since you nda suruh me text you so disini saja me meluahkan, i dont know where else kan luahkan.

i dont know whether u still want this relationship to go on or u want to end it but you have to know several things:

first thing first, you know kan yang you’ve always been my person, you’ve always been the first person yang me bagitau if something came up. mcm school problems kah family problems kah or anything.i’ve shared alot, almost all, i think all secrets and cerita about me or you know stuffs. i know kadang2 ter delay me tuk ceritakan some cerita pasal maybe me lupa since me ane andang pelupa juakan or busy or i dnt know something lah yang smpi buat me inda ingat,tapi ahernya me gtau jua being very very honest to you. but somehow you’ve always mistaken me and cakap things that arent real. you slalu fikir yang you’re the last person yang tau pasal me tetapi sebenarnya it’s sebaliknya. sampai kelayi but then again im sorry im not perfect yangg, otak me penuh dengan barang, everything piles up cna me kan ingat? so im sorry berabis if you salah anggap selama ane, you’ve always been my first, always been :)

secondly,you know apa? everywhere i go,shows/showed signs of you. we’ve made too much memories together. di sekolah me teringat pasal you bcus di ms tah first me jumpa you after a long time, it was last two years masa fun fair/open day di ms. i remembered i said hello to you and smiled and you just waved sambil pigang minuman. you were wearing your green number 1 jersey and i too was wearing green :’) that was quite memorable although bejumpa catu saja :’) and then start tia we go out jalan-jalan mall tia icc tia restaurant tia,awkward eh at first nda tau apakan di cakapkan but then sudah ahernya biasa mcm inda beranti becerita and ketawa and bnyak :’)  awww sweet times sweet times :p apa lagi oh i even came for you masa PSR last year, i was so proud of you jadi wakil brunei for hockey, manang lagi tu satu game, so proud that there’s no words to describe it ;’D

OH YEAH MCDONALD! hehe. now everytime ke mcd or tlipun mcd, teringat ne kan you. one value meal chicken mcdeluxe and minuman tukar milo oh oh and lada banyak2 :) awww :’) it’s like routine tani kalau you kemari or kalau we ke gadong,atupun if cukup duit :p hehehe. but my question is, will this happen again? :”)

apalagi.. oh yeah rockband! that was one of my favourite nights sama you :’) cakap awal2 inda pandai main tapiiiii HANDAL :p jealous me you manang saja :( nada wah hehe. but well played well played! :D and then masa your birthdaay,aww we played bowling :’) sorry ah me inda handal :s sebenarnya me malu kan main since ramai orang, mun inda orang meliat me main wah strike saja tu oleh me :P hoho perasan :p i gave you buzz lightyear you tau napa? pasal sama ah muka you macam ia and coincidently you minat jua :’) heheh.

all and all, since july 2010 when i first added you on fb, i never thought that we could be more than bestfriends :’) i was annoyed by you at first kuat mentext slalu haha but then i started falling for you after you calmed me down when my june olevel results were out :”) then since that each seconds the time tick,i’ve fallen deeper deepest to the deepest inlove with you :’) and i will keep on falling for you until my time stops ticking,in other words, till i breath my last air :’)

we’ve planned alot of things, some worked some didnt.. but yeah i believed in ‘kita berbincang allah yang menentukan’. still,im glad some of it worked although most of the times it didnt.. maybe termasuk what you plan for our first year of being officially together and my upcoming birthday :”) tapi banarnya yang me tunggu our one year anniversery punya plan lah. you know what it is, yang the dinner thingy :’) since i never have romantic dinner sama you, hahah sounds cheesy but i do want it to happen :’)

oh yeah i almost forgot, you dangani me masa me sakit, you sanggup datang ke hospital just tuk dangani me, just untuk jaga me :’) sweet you ane banarnya, you know that? :’) masa me skit mata,masa me betongkat sakit kaki and also masa my operation. all of the scars bagas me sakit and operate atu, smua reminds me of you and will remind me of you. you were there every second that time :’) one of the reasons, me being so thankful to have you as mine :’)

seriously typing while crying doesnt help, banyak hilang ideas yang me kan luahkan :’) aaahhh.. :’(

about just now, the reasons me tanya you soalan bodoh atu pasal me banarnya inda tau cana lagi respond to you since smua reply you ‘okay’ saja, and i dont want our conversation to end pasal macam lama sudah rasanya inda text sama you, skajap2 saja everyday since we fought after betelipun haritu :’( i miss you so much you know that? :’)

lastly, i want to say sorry for every mistakes every single mistakes yang me buat arah you. me sedar me orang yang paling kuat menyusahkan you, mendera you, menyakiti hati you. me sedar jua me girlfriend yang inda bagus, i make your life miserable instead of happy. me tau me banyak kekurangan, me jua masih sedar me manusia biasa :’) me minta maaf dari hujung kaki ke hujung rambut atas semua dosa2 me arah you. and thank you so much for everything for all the good things, the caring,the love,the memories (good or bad), lessons you’ve taught me and more. i dont know how to balas your jasa, i know sorry isnt enough untuk menghapuskan kesalahan me and i know thank you isnt enough after all smua yang you’ve given to me and ajar me. :’)

i want our relationship to go on,to continue on with its journey but if u want to end this me terima. me tau you terseksa since you sama me, i’ve controlled your life macam you ane tinggal dalam kurungan,i’ve hurt you alot of time,i never failed to make mistakes and i cant even make you happy. if i stop you, this would be a wrong thing to do, cus i love you so much more than so much even, an if ending us can make you happy, then why would i want to stop you? :’) not wanting to be with you is the last thing that i want to do but im dong this bcus i love you okay, i love you. i want to see you happy like the old times like how you used to be. seeing you happy will make me happy. ‘mencintai tidak seharusnya memiliki’ :’)

after you habis baca, me harap you text me and bagitahu your decision whether you want this to end or sebaliknya :’) i’ll wait for your texts though it’ll take me forever to wait :’)

you’re a good guy, a boyfriend that a girl would be dying to have.

im still gonna keep my promises god knows until when but i hope until i die, cus i dont want to break another promise after breaking some sudah. im sorry. i love you atif rabbani bin abd rahim, i love you tanpa noktah

ps: if banyak typing error,sorry, again payah typing while crying since me tahan air mata tadi disekolah smpai masuk bilik me :’)

with lots and lots of love,

eleeza <3

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leilockheart:

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aishah-jessicahjoie:

If you constantly remember Allah, Allah will show you signs that He remembers you.

—- “So remember me,I shall remember you.” (Quran 2:152)

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